hello, its been a while since i last properly posted. its been a long day for me, today. i had a busy morning, had no time for lunch, just grabbed a hot cup of milo, had afternoon clinic, came back feeling so weak and ate. head is pounding right now but i m glad for the day.
obturated 2 canals today and was in a rush practically all the time cos patient was 20 minutes late. and honestly i didnt know what i was doing haha. unlike other restorative work, for endo, you ll only truly be relieved until you see the outcome on the xray. i was half obturating half praying and was still praying when i was developing the xray, and when my oburation PA came out, i was like ‘phew!’
so yes. anyway its things like this that make you see how far you ve come. when we were in 4th year and was supposed to be doing crowns and endo, i was practically trying to avoid doing them haha. but i guess when you re in 5th year, there’s no escaping, and you really need to learn. and i came into 5th year, really eager to learn more and polish my skills. and i honestly believe that you ll get what you want if you are really determined to.
my patient cases are now starting to give me headaches but i m trying to see them as opportunities to learn.
anyway, 4.5 weeks more till chin nam comes!
i m starting to maybe find out why i want to go back to malaysia after graduation. 1) its my home and secondly, maybe i m trying to make my relationship work. i ve been with the bf for almost 4 years, and after graduation, it will be about 4.5 years then. i ll be crazy if i didnt say i want this to head somewhere. and i think its only right if i go back if i dont see a long term plan here in new zealand or anywhere. so bottom line is i really dont see my future in aus/nz - career-wise and relationship-wise.
and i dont see whats wrong with thinking that way. and honestly today it really bugged me again when a friend exclaimed ‘WHY!???’ when i said i m most probably going back. “why go back and earm 6k a month?” [honestly lol 4-6k a month in malaysia during your 1st year of work is incredibly good, unless you compare to overseas dentist AND convert the currency to rm] lol i find it really funny and also a lil terrified if we dentists are gonna compare our earnings in the near future. thats horrifying.
anyway yes i m quite glad to have understanding friends too who wont immediately go why this why that on me when i say i ll probably go back.
and ya i always say probably haha because you never know! but i know where’s my heart set for.